Weekday Wit

 

Miscommunication

There are 3 bikers Poop, Manners and Shut up. Poop fell off his motorcycle and Manners went to help him. Shut Up is pulled over by a cop. “What’s your name?”

“Shut Up.”

“No what’s your name?”

“Shut up.”

“I’ll ask you one more time what is your name?” “Shut Up!”

“Where are your manners?

“Back there picking up poop.”

 

Almost but not quite

There is a blonde who is tired of all the blonde jokes going around and decided to dye her hair brown. She then goes for a drive in the country and comes upon a shepherd herding his sheep across the road.
“Hey, shepherd! If I guess how many sheep there are here, can I keep one?” The shepherd is puzzled but agrees.

Out of the blue, she blurts out “352!” He is stunned but keeps his word and allows her to pick out a sheep. She picks out the cutest one.
He looks at her and says “If I guess what colour your hair really is, can I have my dog back?”

 

Bright side

Two missionaries are apprehended by a tribe of very hostile cannibals who put them in a large pot of water, build a huge fire under it, and leave them there. A few minutes later, one of the missionaries starts to laugh uncontrollably.
The other missionary couldn’t believe it! He says, ”What’s wrong with you? We’re being boiled alive! They’re gonna eat us! What could possibly be funny at a time like this?”
The other missionary replies, ”I just peed in the soup!”

 

Driving meme 14 May

 

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