Weekday Wit


Unintended rejection

One night a man approached a blonde at a bar and says, “I couldn’t help but notice you from across the bar. You’re gorgeous. Could I get your number so I could call you sometime?”

“Sure, you can find it in the phone book,” the woman replies.

“But I don’t know your name,” the man says.

“That’s in the phone book too,” she answers.


Quit while you’re ahead

Student: Sir, I have a complaint. I don’t believe I deserve a zero on this exam.

Professor: Neither do I, but it’s the lowest grade I can give.


Daughter to dad texting communication in today’s generation:

Daddy, I am coming home to get married soon, so get out your check book. LOL. I’m in love with a boy who is far away from me. As you know, I am in Australia, and he lives in Scotland. We met on a dating website, became friends on Facebook, had long chats on Whatsapp, he proposed to me on Skype, and now we’ve had two months of relationship through Zoom. My beloved and favourite Dad, I need your blessing, good wishes, and a really big wedding. Lots of love and thanks, Your favourite daughter, Lilly.

Dad’s reply: My Dear Lilly, Like Wow! Really? Cool! Whatever…., I suggest you two get married on Twitter, have fun on Tango, buy your kids on Amazon, and pay for it all through Paypal. And when you get fed up with this new husband, sell him on eBay. Dad.



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