Sleeping on the job

Best excuse if you get caught sleeping in your cubicle:  “I wasn’t sleeping. I was trying to pick up my contact lenses without using my hands.”

Money

“Money can’t buy happiness, but it helps you look for it in more places.” 

Sahara Forest

A large well established lumber camp advertised that they are looking for a good lumberjack. The very next day a skinny little man showed up at the camp with his axe and knocked on the head lumberjacks’ door.

The head lumberjack took one look at the little man and told him to leave.

“Just give me a chance to show you what I can do,” says the skinny man.

“Okay, see that giant redwood over there?” says the lumberjack, “Take your axe and go cut it down.”

The skinny man headed for the tree, and in five minutes he was back knocking on the lumberjack’s door. “I cut the tree down,” says the man.

The lumberjack couldn’t believe his eyes and says, “Where did you get the skill to chop down trees like that?”

“In the Sahara Forest,” replies the puny man.

“You mean the Sahara Desert?” asks the lumberjack.

The little man laughed and answered back, “Oh sure, that’s what they call it now!”

Read more Weekday Wit