Weekday Wit

 

Why you should get a dog

1.The later you are, the more excited your dogs are to see you.
2. Dogs don’t notice if you call them by another dog’s name.
3. Dogs like it if you leave a lot of things on the floor.
4. A dog’s parents never visit.
5. Dogs agree that you have to raise your voice to get your point across.
6. You never have to wait for a dog; they’re ready to go 24 hours a day.
7. Dogs find you amusing when you’re drunk.
8. Dogs like to go hunting and fishing.
9. A dog will not wake you up at night to ask, “If I died, would you get another dog?”
10. A dog will let you put a studded collar on it without calling you a pervert.
11. If a dog smells another dog on you, they don’t get mad. They just think it’s interesting.
12. Dogs like to ride in the back of a bakkie.

And last, but not least:
13. If a dog leaves, it won’t take half of your stuff.

 

Sniffer

A man settles into his seat next to the window on the plane when another man sits down in the aisle seat and puts his black Labrador retriever between them.
The first man asks why the dog is allowed on the plane. The second man explains he is a DEA agent and that the dog is a sniffing dog.
“His name is Sniffer, and he’s the best there is,” he says,”I’ll show you once we get airborne when I put him to work.”
The plane takes off and once it had levels out, the agent says, “Watch this,” he tells Sniffer to “Search!”
Sniffer jumps down, walks along the aisle and finally sits very purposefully next to a woman for several seconds. Sniffer then returns to his seat and puts one paw on the agent’s arm. The agent says, “Good boy.”

He turns to the other man and says, “That woman is in possession of marijuana, so I’m making a note of her seat number. The authorities will apprehend her when we land.”
“Say, that’s pretty neat,” replies the first man. Once again, the agent sent Sniffer to search the aisles. The Lab sniffs about, sits down beside a man for a few seconds, returns to his seat and places two paws on the agent’s arm. The agent says, “That man is carrying cocaine, so again, I’m making a note of his seat number for the police.”
The agent then tells Sniffer to search again. Sniffer walks up and down the aisles for a little while, sits down for a moment and then came racing back to the agent. He jumps into the middle seat and proceeded to poop all over the place. The first man is really disgusted by this behaviour and can’t figure out why a well-trained dog would act like that, so he asks the agent, “What’s going on?”

The agent nervously replies, “He just found a bomb!”

 

Meme 27 Aug

 

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