Yesterday, I was washing the car with my son.
He said: Dad, can’t you just use a sponge?
I am giving up drinking for a month. Sorry, that came out wrong.
I am giving up. Drinking for a month.
A man lost his watch at a party once. When he eventually found it, he then saw a guy step on it while harassing a girl. He walked up and punched him right on the nose.
“No one does that to a girl…not on my watch.”
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