The good and the bad
Two old friends, Ned and John, lived for baseball. Then one day, John died, leaving Ned inconsolable. A few weeks later, Ned heard someone calling his name. He looked up. Standing on a cloud was his old pal.
“Ned,” John called down, “I have good news and bad. The good news is, there’s baseball in heaven!”
“Great,” said Ned. “What’s the bad news?”
“You’re pitching Sunday.”
I’m sick of following my dreams. I’m just going to ask where they’re going and hook up with ’em later.
Yes, I do
A man works in the front office of a housing complex that supports people living with mental illness. On one particularly hectic day, a tenant came in to pay her rent. Frazzled, he says, “Ever have one of those days when you feel everyone is out to get you?”
She smiles and replies, “I take medication for that.”
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