Weekday Wit

 

Motivation

The teenager loses a contact lens while playing basketball in his driveway. After a brief, fruitless search, he gives up. His mother takes up the cause and within minutes finds the lens.
“How did you do it?” he asks.
“We weren’t looking for the same thing,” she explains. “You were looking for a piece of plastic. I was looking for a couple hundred Rand.”

 

Truth and dare

Moved by the church service, the richest man in town stood up and addressed the congregation. “I remember the day I earned my first dollar,” he said.
“That night I went to a church meeting and the speaker told us about his humanitarian work. I had only that single dollar, and I had to make a decision: Give it to his worthy cause or keep it. So I gave him all the money I had. I believe that God blessed that decision, and that is why I am a millionaire today.”
As he sat down, a woman shouted, “I dare you to do it again.”

 

Reality check

A job applicant was asked, “What would you consider to be your main strengths and weaknesses?”
“Well,” he began, “my main weakness would definitely be my issues with reality—telling what’s real from what’s not.”
“Okay,” said the interviewer. “And what about your strengths?”
“I’m Batman.”

 

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