Buying a car
After successfully defending his client in a lawsuit, the attorney hands him the bill.
“You can pay me twenty thousand now,” the lawyer says “Then eight thousand a month for the next thirty-six months.”
His client responds, “That sounds like buying a car.”
The lawyer nods, “It actually is.”
Unfair standards
Two men are sitting on a park bench talking.
One man says, “In the televised Sports Illustrated swimsuit contest, the girls walk down the aisle in bikinis, and it’s called art and fashion. I did that in a Speedo after I’d had a few beers the other day and now I’m not allowed back into the casino.”
Quick Thinking
A human resource person is quizzing a new employee on the company’s safety manual.
“And what steps do you take in case of a fire?” she asks.
The new employee replies, “Quick ones.”
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