Blonde catastrophe
A blonde is speeding down the highway in her little red sports car and gets pulled over by a police officer, who is also a blonde.
The blonde cop asks to see the blonde’s driving license.
She digs through her purse and is getting progressively more agitated.
“What does it look like?” she asks.
The policewoman replies, “It’s square and has your picture on it.”
The driver finally finds a square mirror in her purse, looks at it and hands it to the policewoman.
“Here it is,” she says.
The officer looks at the mirror, then hands it back saying, “OK, you can go, I didn’t realise you were a cop.”
Definition of 65
A SASSA Grant Officer agent to applicant: “Feeling 65 isn’t enough. You must be 65.”
Depressed lunch
Three football players get jobs as construction workers after they fail to graduate from college. One day they are sitting on top of a 30- story building eating lunch.
One says to the other two that if he finds polony sandwiches in his lunch one more time, he will jump off the building.
The second worker says,” If I get tuna sandwiches one more time, I’ll jump off the building.’’
The third worker says,’’ If I get peanut butter sandwiches one more time I’m going to jump.’’
The next day they all had the same type of sandwich that they had complained about and they all jumped.
A few days later their wives are talking at the joint funeral.
The first wife says,’’ I didn’t believe Bo really meant it. I guess I should have listened.’’
The second wife says, ‘’I didn’t think Jan would jump, but I was wrong.’’
The third wife says,’’ Well I don’t know why my hubby jumped. He packs his own lunch.’’
Read more Weekday Wit
