A real gamble
A horse-racing enthusiast is explaining his recent experience at the track to a friend.
“I went to the track on the eleventh day of the eleventh month. I got there at exactly 11am. My daughter was eleven years old that day and the eleventh race had eleven horses. So, I put all my money on a long shot, the eleventh horse.
His friend responds, “And the horse won?”
“No,’’ the enthusiast replies, “It came out in eleventh position!”
When retirement is best
A retired woman in her 70s becomes a substitute teacher to stay busy.
One day she asks her grade four class to guess her favourite sport.
Since her favourite sport was pickleball, the students are not having much luck.
So, she gives them a hint, “It starts with the letter P.”
They guess, paragliding, polo, ping-pong without success.
Then one boy insists he has the answer.
“I know,” he says, “pole dancing.”
Faulty glasses
A blonde is returning a pair of glasses that she purchased for her husband.
The clerk asks, “What seems to be the problem with the glasses ma’am?”
“I bought them for my husband, but they don’t work,” she replies. “He’s still not seeing things my way.”
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