From the mouth of a babe
A woman and her four-year-old son are standing in line at a fast-food restaurant when a man walks in covered in tattoos.
The boy turns to him and says, “Looks like somebody got into the markers.”
Deforestation
A large, well established, Canadian lumber camp advertises that they are looking for a good lumberjack.
The very next day, a skinny little man shows up at the camp with his axe and knocks on the head lumberjack’s door.
The head lumberjack takes one look at the little man and tells him to leave.
“Just give me a chance to show you what I can do,” says the skinny man.
“Okay, see that giant redwood over there?” says the lumberjack. “Take your axe and go cut it down.” The skinny man heads for the tree, and in five minutes he is back knocking on the lumberjack’s door. “I cut the tree down,” says the man.
The lumberjack cannot believe his eyes and says, “Where did you get the skill to chop down trees like that?”
“In the Sahara Forest,” replies the puny man.
“You mean the Sahara Desert,” says the lumberjack.
The little man laughs and answers back, “Oh sure, that’s what they call it now!”
Quotes about aging
- Time may be a great healer, but it’s a lousy beautician
- When your friends begin to flatter you on how young you look, it’s a sure sign that you are getting old – Mark Twain
- As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes and I can’t remember the other two – Sir Norman Wilson
Read more Weekday Wit
