Lunch for breakfast
A woman asks her four-year-old son what he wants for breakfast.
He says, “Soup.”
She says, “We eat soup for lunch, not breakfast. So, what do you want?”
He replies, “Lunch.”
No filter
A grandmother is helping her blissful teenage granddaughter get ready for her first formal dance.
The girl turns to her and asks, “Granny, did they have parties like this when you were alive?”
A know-it-all
All evening four card players are pestered by a busybody who comments on everyone’s hand and style of play.
When he goes out of the room for a moment, they devise a plan to silence him.
“Let’s make up a game no one’s ever heard of,” one of them says,’’ Then he’ll have to shut up.”
The busybody returns.
The dealer tears two cards in half and gives them to the man on his left.
He tears the corners off three cards and spreads them out in front of the man opposite him.
Then he tears five cards in quarters, gives 15 pieces to the man on his right and keeps five himself.
“I have a mingle,” he says. “I will bet R100.”
“I have a snazzle,” the next man announces, “I will raise you R100.”
The third man folds without betting.
The fourth, after much deliberation, says, “I’ve got a farfle. I will raise you two hundred.”
The busybody shakes his head vehemently.
“You’re crazy,” he says. ” You’re never going to beat a mingle and a snazzle with a lousy farfle!”
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